Key Moments

288 ‒ The impact of gratitude, serving others, embracing mortality, and living intentionally

Peter Attia MDPeter Attia MD
Science & Technology4 min read100 min video
Feb 5, 2024|71,091 views|1,523|148
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TL;DR

Walter Green, an 85-year-old philanthropist, shares life lessons on gratitude, intentionality, and embracing mortality.

Key Insights

1

Gratitude and expressing appreciation for others while they are alive is profoundly enriching and can prevent regret.

2

Intentional living, characterized by prioritizing what truly matters and learning to say 'no' to distractions, is key to a fulfilling life.

3

Embracing mortality, rather than fearing it, can be a powerful motivator for living a more present and principled life.

4

Overcoming personal challenges, including a difficult childhood and mental health struggles, can build resilience and offer unique insights.

5

Cultivating deep, authentic relationships and acknowledging their impact is more vital than traditional measures of success.

6

The 'Say It Now' movement encourages timely expressions of gratitude, offering a platform and tools for people to connect meaningfully.

FROM CHALLENGES TO RESILIENCE: A FORMATIVE CHILDHOOD

Walter Green recounts a childhood marked by significant instability and loss, beginning with his father's financial ruin and subsequent bankruptcy when Walter was young. This led to frequent moves and a life lived in multiple cities. Further compounding these challenges, Walter's mother battled cancer when he was nine, and his father tragically died of a heart attack in his early fifties. These early life events, characterized by a lack of stable relationships and a profound awareness of life's fragility, instilled in him a deep sense of intentionality and a drive to make the most of every moment.

NAVIGATING ADULTHOOD AND MENTAL HEALTH

After graduating from the University of Michigan, Green faced unemployment and a significant mental health crisis. He experienced a catatonic state, leading to hospitalization and a period of recovery. This experience, coupled with the understandable fear of societal stigma, led him to not discuss it for decades. He later pursued public accounting and insurance sales, eventually finding success in the executive conference center industry. This phase of his life, while professionally rewarding, also highlighted the importance of personal well-being and the need for authentic connection amidst career ambitions.

THE 'SAY IT NOW' MOVEMENT: CELEBRATING RELATIONSHIPS AT 50

A pivotal moment occurred on Walter's 50th birthday, where he consciously shifted the focus from himself to celebrating the five closest friends who had enriched his life. This involved a weekend of planned activities, where he publicly expressed his gratitude and detailed their impact. The profound positive reception from his friends, who collectively created a keepsake book for him, revealed the deep need for such expressions. This experience laid the foundation for the 'Say It Now' concept, emphasizing the power of expressing appreciation while individuals are alive.

EXPANDING THE VISION: THE 'SAY IT NOW' JOURNEY AT 70

At 70, inspired by events like Tim Russert's funeral and the stories of others facing mortality, Walter embarked on a more extensive journey. Over 11 months, he visited 44 significant people from his life, documenting their impact and his gratitude. This deliberate process, systematized with legal pads and recorded conversations, culminated in personalized letters, CDs, and framed mementos. This deeply personal exploration not only reinforced the value of relationships but also led to his book, "This Is the Moment!", and further amplified the 'Say It Now' message globally.

INTENTIONAL LIVING: THE POWER OF SAYING 'NO'

Walter Green emphasizes the practice of intentional living, which involves a deliberate focus on what truly matters and the ability to decline opportunities that do not align with one's core values and goals. This intentionality, honed through years of self-reflection and structured thinking, enables him to clarify desired outcomes and work backward to achieve them. This discipline allows him to prioritize meaningful relationships and purposeful activities, distinguishing between 'pastime' and 'purpose time,' and avoiding the regret of wasted moments.

EMBRACING MORTALITY AND FINISHING STRONG

Approaching his late eighties, Walter reflects on mortality not with fear, but with a deep appreciation for life's blessings. He advocates for living intentionally and expressing gratitude to prevent the regret of unsaid words. He emphasizes that embracing mortality can provide clarity and peace. The 'Say It Now' movement, now reaching millions through educational materials and online platforms, is his legacy, encouraging universal acts of kindness and appreciation. His recent 'finishing strong' exercise involved logistical preparations for his wife's comfort and liquidating investments, ensuring peace of mind and continued service.

THE 'SAY IT NOW' MOVEMENT: A GLOBAL INITIATIVE

The 'Say It Now' movement, initiated by Walter Green, aims to make expressing gratitude a commonplace practice. It provides resources and encourages individuals to acknowledge the impact others have had on their lives. The movement has expanded into educational settings, reaching thousands of classrooms worldwide, teaching fifth through twelfth graders the importance of timely appreciation. This proactive approach aims to instill these values in younger generations, fostering a culture where meaningful connections and expressions of gratitude are prioritized, preventing the pain of unacknowledged impact.

THE ESSENCE OF AUTHENTIC RELATIONSHIPS AND PURPOSE

Green differentiates between associations and genuine friendships, stressing the importance of authenticity and empathy in cultivating deep connections. He believes that a life focused on others and driven by purpose, rather than solely on personal gain, leads to greater fulfillment and longevity. This perspective is reflected in his own life, where his focus has shifted from traditional success metrics to philanthropy, mentoring, and fostering meaningful interactions. The concept of 'purpose time' over 'pastime' highlights his conviction that a life dedicated to serving others is the most rewarding.

Common Questions

The 'Pay It Forward' concept means doing something nice for three other people if someone does something kind for you. Walter hopes the 'Say It Now' movement becomes as ubiquitous and common, so people actively express gratitude to those who have impacted their lives.

Topics

Mentioned in this video

bookTuesdays with Morrie

Book mentioned by Walter about getting authentic and deliberate in final years.

locationMassachusetts

State where Walter was hospitalized for mental health treatment.

companyHay House

Publishing company whose editorial director offered Walter a book contract for 'This is the Moment'.

locationOntario, Canada

Location of a kindergarten teacher, Joanne, who successfully implemented the 'Say It Now' concept in her classroom.

mediaBruch Violin Concerto

A musical piece Walter listens to for reflection and appreciation.

locationJacksonville, Florida

One of the cities Walter lived in during his childhood, home after his father's heart attack.

locationPittsburgh

City where Walter worked selling industrial textiles after college.

bookIn Between

Book written by Hadley Vose, a hospice nurse, detailing the importance of people knowing they mattered before dying.

locationCoral Gables, Florida

One of the cities Walter lived in during his childhood.

mediaPhantom of the Opera

Broadway show, mentioned as part of the activities for Walter's 50th birthday celebration.

bookThis is the Moment

Walter's book, subtitled 'How one man's year-long journey captured the extraordinary power of gratitude'.

personHadley Vose

A hospice nurse who wrote the book 'In Between', about patients' last moments and the importance of feeling valued.

mediaTEDx Talk

A public speaking event where Walter shared his message, and his mentees attended.

locationCorsica

Island where Walter had a medical emergency that required immediate surgery.

softwarejustsayitnow.org

Website Walter recommends for resources and tools related to the 'Say It Now' concept.

locationAlbany, New York

One of the cities Walter lived in during his childhood.

personBob Cummings

Individual involved in a multi-level marketing scheme selling vitamins, which Walter briefly joined.

personFred Jervis

Taught a program at the Center for Constructive Change that significantly influenced Walter's thinking process.

personTim Russert

Brilliant moderator of 'Meet the Press' whose funeral inspired Walter to express appreciation to people while they are alive.

mediaMeet the Press

News program moderated by Tim Russert.

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