Key Moments
The Willingness to Be Laughed At | Devashish Chakravarty | TEDxJaipur National University
TEDKey Moments
Willingness to be incompetent and laughed at is a superpower, enabling growth and achievement that protecting your image prevents.
Key Insights
The speaker, a former army officer and entrepreneur, claims that protecting one's image is one of the most expensive habits people carry, hindering growth.
Despite not knowing how to skate, the speaker captained an ice hockey team that lost 28-0 but, with one day of practice to learn to stand, later won a match 5-4, demonstrating rapid skill acquisition through deliberate incompetence.
After leaving the army, the speaker experienced panic and self-doubt, feeling incompetent and rejected by a call center, but found relief in hitting 'zero' where the need to 'look good' was gone.
Two software engineers with no prior experience in the industry built one of India's largest flower and cake delivery businesses over 15 years by being willing to face numerous failures, including broken noses and slammed doors, demonstrating the power of sustained incompetence.
The speaker argues that opportunities for growth often come in areas where one is initially incompetent, such as new roles, higher education, or job changes, and that embracing this discomfort is key to eventual competence.
An unexpected ice hockey challenge
The speaker recounts an experience at 5:00 a.m. in Ladakh, -20°C temperatures, on a frozen lake, where he, as captain of his ice hockey team, had skates fitted to his army boots by a cobbler without any sense of balance. He didn't know how to skate. As the referee called them in, he turned to his team and fell flat on his face. The crowd, anticipated to cheer, had gathered to laugh. This incident, and the subsequent realization of being unprepared, highlights the common societal advice to avoid situations where one might appear incompetent or be laughed at. The speaker posits that this fear of public failure prevents individuals from accessing a vast world of growth.
Overcoming physical weakness through sheer will
Early in his military career at the National Defence Academy, despite being academically successful and ranked #1 in the UPSC selection process, the speaker was physically one of the weakest cadets. During a 25km forced march with weights and weapons, he couldn't keep up and dropped out, letting his team come last. The silence from his team was more painful than any abuse. This experience instilled a deep resolve never to let his team down again due to physical weakness. The next morning, he volunteered for the heaviest tasks, carrying them as long as possible. By his fourth year, he was in the top third physically, a significant improvement born from overcoming shame and guilt. This drive to compensate for initial incompetence eventually led him to take up sailing, where after years of falling into the water, he represented India at 29, standing 17th out of 25 participants. Twelve years after the failed march, the internal voice of self-doubt quieted, signaling a hard-won competence.
Embracing public ridicule in ice hockey
At 22, the speaker was unexpectedly tasked with captaining an ice hockey team for a championship with less than 24 hours' notice, despite never having worn roller skates, let alone ice skates. His team was equally inexperienced. The first match was a disaster, with the score reaching 28-0 in 12 minutes due to their inability to stand or defend. The crowd's laughter was overwhelming, leading to extreme embarrassment. The next day, a full garrison turned up to witness the spectacle. Requesting a day off and proper equipment before the next match, the team focused solely on learning to stand on skates and practicing defense. They formed a human wall in front of their goal, preventing any scores. The match went to a penalty shootout, which they surprisingly won 5-4. This victory at the hands of public derision transformed their experience from humiliation to triumph, eventually leading their team to the semi-finals. This demonstrated a different level of incompetence: being publicly laughed at and choosing to persist.
Losing identity and finding relief at zero
After 17 years in the army, the speaker took voluntary retirement in December 2004. On his last working day, as he drove to the airport to shed his uniform, he experienced a severe panic attack, questioning his identity and skills outside the military. Feeling like he knew nothing and would be unrecognized, he contemplated withdrawing his resignation. Without a pension due to early retirement, he desperately sought civilian employment. A humiliating experience at a walk-in interview for a call center team leader role, where the operations manager recognized him as a former Sergeant and asked him to leave to avoid embarrassing himself, became a turning point. Instead of feeling wounded pride, he felt immense relief. Having already mentally shed his army identity and come down to 'zero,' the rejection removed the pressure to 'look good,' which he identified as an expensive habit that can block growth.
The expensive habit of protecting one's image
The speaker contrasts the relief he felt at 'zero' with the ongoing struggle of maintaining an image. He successfully prepared for and graduated from IIM, becoming an entrepreneur. On two occasions, he had reasonable offers to buy out his companies. However, his narrative of being an 'entrepreneur' prevented him from selling and becoming an employee elsewhere, leading him to refuse the deals. This decision, driven by a need to 'look good' and maintain his self-image, cost him valuable time and potential growth. He argues that this desire to protect one's image acts as a cage, preventing individuals from stepping into new, potentially unfamiliar territories and thus limiting their potential.
Building a business from deliberate incompetence
Two software engineers within the speaker's company, despite knowing nothing about sales or retail, decided to compete in the flower and gift market against established leaders. Their families and investors were distressed, but they proceeded. They were willing to be incompetent, to be laughed at, and to face significant challenges. During a delivery, one of them banged his nose against a glass door, breaking it and nearly fainting. They were chased by dogs and had a door slammed in their faces. Yet, they persisted. This willingness to endure broken noses, dog chases, and slammed doors, and to do something entirely new, eventually led them to build one of India's largest flower and cake delivery businesses over 15 years, without initial investment. Their success stemmed from their courage to step outside their comfort zone and embrace failure.
Embracing imperfection as a superpower
The speaker concludes by framing the willingness to be incompetent and laughed at as a superpower, unlike those people are born with. He suggests that every day presents opportunities for growth that are often in areas where we are not yet competent—whether graduating, seeking higher education, or changing jobs. Facing potential failure and public criticism is part of this process. He urges the audience to consider whether they will remain in the 'cage' of protecting their image or step out into the world of growth by being willing to be incompetent. He draws parallels to his own experiences, including the failed march, the disastrous ice hockey match, the panic attack after military retirement, and the determined software engineers, all demonstrating that embracing incompetence leads to eventual competence and unique achievements.
Mentioned in This Episode
●Software & Apps
●Organizations
Ice Hockey Match Scores and Outcomes
Data extracted from this episode
| Match Context | Score | Outcome |
|---|---|---|
| First match (captain, incompetent) | 28-0 (after 12 min) | Match ended early due to extreme score difference |
| Second match (captain, with practice) | 5-4 (after penalty shootout) | Won match |
| Semi-finals (captain, against best team) | 17-0 | Lost match |
Common Questions
The core message is that embracing incompetence and being willing to be laughed at is a superpower for growth. It allows individuals to step outside their comfort zones, learn new skills, and achieve potential they wouldn't otherwise reach.
Topics
Mentioned in this video
The selection process for the National Defense Academy, in which the speaker ranked number one.
The speaker served in the Indian army for 17 years and reflects on how his identity was tied to it.
Indian Institute of Management, where the speaker joined after achieving a 100 percentile in the CAT exam.
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