Key Moments
Identity, System & Standing Through | NISHA YOGESHWAR | TEDxCMRIT
TEDKey Moments
Women's lived realities are fundamentally different from men's due to a system designed by men, creating pervasive biases and systemic disadvantages that require women's leadership to correct.
Key Insights
For women, the system is designed such that they are always outsiders, facing issues that are not understood or solved by the outside world.
In India, women are paid 19% less than men for the same job, yet spend 19% more on products due to the pink tax.
Leadership roles for women are often given based on appearance, whereas men are given roles based on potential.
Women tend to make spending decisions differently than men, focusing on long-term sustainability and multi-layered risks, compared to men's focus on immediate outcomes and competitive hierarchies.
Legislative bills like Narathi Wandium, once passed, could enable women's entry into leadership positions in governance, which then trickles down to societal systems.
Sisterhood is crucial for women to support each other through shared biases and struggles, as the world is not accustomed to seeing two strong women collaborating.
The shattering realization of a false reality
The journey for many begins with a 'glass shattering' moment, a realization that the world they built in their minds, the stories they told themselves, were not real but false. This can be a heartbreaking experience, especially when navigating a world that is not easy. The speaker recounts her own experience within families, particularly those with wealth or political influence, where societal reputation creates boundaries. In such environments, individuals, especially women, can live in shadows, struggling to define their identity. Despite possessing talent, effort, and determination, they face limitations, waiting for hope or a window to open, for their sacrifices to be understood, and for their turn to come. However, in some families, this fight for identity leads to foundations being systematically broken down not by external forces, but by family members who tie their hands, preventing them from building a life of dignity and purpose.
The system is not designed to support women
The speaker highlights a critical disconnect: the system that was supposed to empower women largely does not exist. While men, even without family support, can find external options because the system is designed to empower them, women often lack this recourse. If a woman faces a lack of support from her family – her husband, father – and seeks help externally, she is often questioned, implying something is wrong with her. This is not the case for men. When women are denied support at home, they knock on doors seeking wisdom and understanding, but often find that every person holding the handle to these doors is a man who does not grasp their experiences of subjugation or violence, finding it 'normal'. This normalization of female oppression means that a woman standing up for her rights is often deemed 'insane' because her basic needs and aspirations are perceived as asking for too much by those who have never understood her world.
Men and women inhabit fundamentally different worlds
The core of the speaker's argument is that men and women do not inhabit the same world, primarily because they are taught to deal with circumstances and situations entirely differently from childhood. Examples include girls being told to 'drive slow' and 'be patient' behind the wheel, while boys are encouraged to 'speed up' and not 'be a girl.' This differential upbringing instills different behaviors and expectations. In the systemic sense, a woman is perpetually an 'outsider' because the system was designed by men during a time when women were not as prevalent in the professional world. Men are the architects of this world, and thus, their problems are understood, solved, and integrated into the system. Conversely, women's problems often remain unaddressed and unresolved by this male-dominated structure, creating a persistent disparity in lived experience and opportunity.
Economic and professional disparities
The financial and professional arenas starkly illustrate the systemic disadvantages faced by women. In India, women earn 19% less than men for the same job, a disparity exacerbated by the 'pink tax,' where they spend 19% more on products. While women finish their office work and return home to an additional 7-8 hours of domestic labor, men are largely exempt from this second shift. Furthermore, women often have to prove their merit repeatedly to attain leadership roles, whereas men are frequently given these positions based on their perceived potential. In some cases, leadership roles for women are even based on appearance, a notion quickly debunked by the lack of visibly 'beautiful' women in top positions when merit is considered. Even in corporate decision-making, legislative mandates often require only one woman on a board of directors, indicating a significant shortfall in women's representation at the highest levels.
The necessity of systemic change for true empowerment
Discussions around women's empowerment, including efforts against domestic violence, skill development, and economic advancement, remain insufficient unless women occupy top leadership positions. Reforms enacted through these grassroots efforts do not translate into systemic change without women driving them from the top. The speaker argues that women, by nature, understand subjects more comprehensively and are crucial for decision-making due to their inclination towards long-term sustainability, multi-layered risk assessment, collaboration, and empathy, contrasting with men's typical focus on immediate goals, competitive hierarchies, and self-protection. A world built with the combined 'minds' of both men and women promises greater sustainability and a more balanced approach.
The role of legislation and sisterhood
Legislation like the Narathi Wandium bill, once passed, could be instrumental in paving the way for women's entry into leadership roles, particularly in governance, which can then influence societal systems. Beyond policy, the concept of 'sisterhood' is presented as a vital tool for women. The speaker shares an anecdote about her business partner where their collaboration was met with surprise, as the world is unaccustomed to two strong women working together. Sisterhood is essential because only women can truly understand and support each other through the shared biases, struggles, and societal expectations they face. This mutual support is critical for women to overcome self-doubt, hesitation, and the loneliness that often accompanies pursuing ambitions in a world not yet built for their full participation.
Beyond belonging: A woman's inherent capacity to nurture systems
While societal roles like mother, daughter, wife, or daughter-in-law are important, the speaker emphasizes that a woman's capacity extends far beyond belonging to a single family. Women are inherently built to give to the entire world and nurture communities and entire systems. However, the journey to realize this potential is fraught with challenges: overcoming doubt, hesitation, being the sole representative in a room, facing questioning for ambitions, and enduring guilt for not fulfilling domestic expectations. This path is often lonely, as others may not fully grasp the internal drive that compels women to pursue their goals because they 'know that they can.' The strength to stand firm at each step is paramount. Ultimately, achieving an equal and better world requires more women at the decision-making table, transitioning from an 'inclusive' world to one that is truly equitable.
Mentioned in This Episode
●Organizations
●People Referenced
Navigating Identity and Systemic Barriers for Women
Practical takeaways from this episode
Do This
Avoid This
Gender Disparities in Economic and Professional Spheres
Data extracted from this episode
| Area | Women's Situation | Men's Situation |
|---|---|---|
| Pay for Same Job (India) | Paid 19% less | Implied higher pay |
| Spending on Products (Pink Tax) | Spend 19% more | Implied standard cost |
| Working Hours (Post-Office/Business) | Additional 7-8 hours | Mostly exempt |
| Leadership Role Assignment | Based on proof/merit (often questioned) | Based on potential |
| Board of Directors Representation | Often only one mandated woman | Majority representation |
Decision-Making Paradigms: Women vs. Men
Data extracted from this episode
| Aspect | Women's Approach | Men's Approach |
|---|---|---|
| Focus | Long-term sustainability | Single-minded goals (immediate outcome) |
| Risk Assessment | Multi-layered risk | Competitive hierarchies |
| Interpersonal Dynamics | Collaboration and empathy | Status and self-protection |
Common Questions
Nisha Yogishwar describes the 'glass shattering' moment as a realization in life when the false reality or world one has built within finally breaks. This is often a heartbreaking experience but can serve as a breakthrough, allowing a truer understanding of oneself and the world to emerge.
Topics
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